The Walkerville Weekly Reader

National Desk: Hard-hitting journalism from your completely un-biased (pinky swear!) reporters in Walkerville, VA.

Walkerville, VA
Monday, September 18, 2017
Carolyn Purcell, Editor

Jesus Christ denied nomination

President withdraws controversial civil rights nominee.

President Clinton withdrew his nomination of Jesus Christ as Civil Rights Assistant this morning. In a short press conference, he said “No one disputes Mr. Christ’s qualifications; he is the Son of God. But in his biographies--and there are at least four, written by close friends--he clearly advocates a radical lifestyle that I cannot support.”

Asked whether he should have known about these disqualifications before nominating the controversial preacher, the President said, “I wish that I had read these books before nominating him.”

  1. <- First Lady resigns
  2. Founding Traitor ->