Mitt Romney: 9/11 mastermind
Media accuses Governor Romney of plotting 9/11 to embarrass President Obama. Obama responds by freeing unjustly accused Omar Abdel-Rahman.
CBS and NPR discover photo of Mitt Romney in 1993.
There were riots against American embassies throughout the Middle East this past September 11, causing confusion among foreign affairs experts at major news outlets and within the White House.
“It appears to be a random date,” said President Obama at a Vegas fundraiser. “We can’t think of any reason for them to attack our embassies today.”
According to United States Ambassador to the United Nations Susan Rice, “Based on the best information we have to date, what our assessment is as of the present, we think maybe they were offended by a YouTube video? I can’t think of anything else important about today, nothing they might want to commemorate.”
President Obama furiously said that he has decisively flagged the YouTube video for review by Google in response to rioters burning down the United States embassy in Libya.
“We’re also thinking about unfriending them on FaceBook,” said Vice President Joe Biden.
“We’re still friends with them,” President Obama added quickly and firmly, and a touch furiously. “Just not friend-friends.”
Governor Mitt Romney, President Obama’s beleaguered opponent in the upcoming presidential elections, made irrelevant comments, and was mostly ignored by the media until new information arose that he held the key to understanding the day’s events.
Major media outlets, except Fox News, discovered that Governor Romney set up terrorist attacks in 1993 and in 2001 so that he could criticize the President for not acting decisively enough eleven years later. This turns out to be a major gaffe for Romney, as all major news outlets are reporting on his complicity in the World Trade Center attacks rather than on current news, which isn’t very important anyway.
“It’s a slow news day,” said New York Times media correspondent Brian Stelter.
According to Stelter, Fox News is complicit in Romney’s guilt. “As of 10:15pm, Fox News has not mentioned the Romney gaffe once. The Fox News focus is on burning embassies, the U.S. credit downgrade, the rising whatever trillion dollar debt, 23 million Americans out of work, unimportant distractions that no one cares about. Certainly no one in the White House.”
Stelter noted that this is further proof that Fox News is not a real news organization.
In response to this new information, President Obama has decided to release Sheik Omar Abdel-Rahman, the man previously accused of committing the 1993 attacks on the World Trade Center that led to the obscure September attacks in 2001. According to the White House, now that the true perpetrator has been found Abdel-Rahman will either be released to Egypt, be offered a job in the State Department, or take over for Joe Biden as Vice President.
Obama added that the election was now his. “Americans will never elect a president who consorts with terrorists, whose friends nail-bomb police and blow up government buildings.”
- 3 Reasons the Obama Administration Didn't Want to Admit Benghazi was a Terrorist Attack: Nick Gillespie at Reason Magazine
- “Now, Lake reports, it turns out that within 24 hours of the attack, U.S. officials not only had information about who carried out the attack, but enough information to ‘target’ at least one of the participants in the attack.” (Memeorandum thread)
- The emerging scandal of what happened in Libya: William A. Jacobson at Legal Insurrection
- “It is plainly obvious that we have not been getting straight answers from Obama officials about what they knew and when they knew it about the dangers facing our consulate in Benghazi and throughout the region. It may be deception, or they may be so incompetent they still don’t know.”
- The Insane MSM Questions Romney Faced at Presser: Katrina Trinko
- “So if a presidential candidate gives remarks about a foreign-policy crisis, you’d be forgiven for thinking that in the Q&A held immediately afterward, reporters would ask him about… foreign policy.” (Memeorandum thread)
- Middle East and Journalism in flames: William A. Jacobson at Legal Insurrection
- “So far every MSM Q about Romney statement, not about dead Ambassador dragged through streets.” (Memeorandum thread)
- Second Obama Official Confirms They Are Considering Handing Blind Sheikh Omar Abdel-Rahman Over To Egypt…: Zip at Weasel Zippers
- “The Obama administration is weighing the release of blind Sheik Omar Abdel-Rahman—the spiritual adviser to the 1993 World Trade Center bombers—in a stunning goodwill gesture toward Egypt that has touched off a political firestorm, officials said yesterday.” (Memeorandum thread)
More HashTagDiplomacy
- Ready, aim, negotiate: NASA tweets rogue asteroids to divert themselves
- Hashtag diplomacy becomes hashtag science, as the White House leverages modern social media to fight the most ancient of threats.
- President Obama violin concertos console bereaved Iraqis
- President’s iPod an oasis in crisis for the stress of a historic presidency, and the Middle East.
Minnesota Representative: Stop White Hate: In the wake of anti-white violence by a Muslim shooter in Denver, Representative Ilhan Omar begins campaign to “stand together to stop white hate.” (read more…)